Category Archives: Random thoughts

The Origin of Celebrities

The second entrant into my Origin of Species Celebrities exhibit is the one and only Bjork.

 It would have been easy to align her with a water dweling feathered creature as a  result of her 2001 Oscars outfit, however, while watching her Big Time Sensuality video (during a sweet 90’s special) there was one clear animal connection I couldn’t ignore.

Bjork/Cera (Land Before Time)

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Action stars work hard for the money – Japanese commercial madness!


In my drowsy-cold-medicated state I got to thinking about Nic Cage (this happens more often than I care to disclose) in particular, how he fits into this crazy mixed up world. It becomes exceedingly more apparent with each new entry into his body of work that he is on another level, one much different to that of us mere mortals. Good different? Lord no, but different nonetheless.

It must be so hard for Cage, as he is continually panned for his erratically-outlandish-unnecessarily-over-the-top acting (mostly by me) there must be someone, somewhere that calls for exactly that type of thing. There is – it’s called Japan:

Cage

The intention of this post was to showcase Cage, however, I stumbled across a few other action stars have also gotten in on the game:

Willis

Stallone

Van Damme

 Seagal

 Arnie



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Villains with Trump hair – Series 1

And so it begins…

Lord Trump

Freddy Trump

Penguin Trump

Hellraiser Trump

Darth Trump

Predator Trump

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Villains with Trump hair – an intro

As the years pass by I find myself becoming increasingly out of touch with technology. Just last night I struggled to grasp the concept of the new Myki system while catching the train into the city. As I stood at the turnstile swiping my card frantically to no avail, like so many senior citizens before me, I knew something had to be done.

I’m not going out like a chump. I need to conquer technology.

I’ve decided to start with Photoshop. Not being a fan of copius amounts of tutorial reading, I’ve given myself a little project – Trumpafying villains.

Why?! Do I really need a reason?
I do? Ok well here’s just one…

I’m pretty much afraid of everything, name an irrational fear and I’ve got it. I’ve spent many a night looking for a cure: hypnotism, interpretive dance, light tranquilisers – nothing has worked…until now. I have discovered no villain (dare I say, no thing) can be scary if Trump hair is placed strategically atop it.

Here’s a taste…

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The origin of species/celebrities 1

Sometimes you see a celebrity and think they look particularly familiar. You know it’s not due to the fact that their image has probably been clogging up every media source known to man…it’s something else…

…they look like an animal.

This is the first in my The Origin of  Species Celebrities series.

Sloth – Cheryl Tiegs

                                                                                                                    

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Trump Hair – A Tribute

Myself and a few of my favourite people started watching the latest season of Celebrity Apprentice yesterday. No, not the poor-man’s (i.e. Australian) version. The real deal. The Trump.

It got me thinking how lucky we are to bare witness to such an amazing family. Not amazing due to their extreme wealth, education or any of that boring BS. Amazing as a result of the family genes they have received. In particular those that formed their magnificent skull coverings – their hair.

Today I am not going to write a long winded review on the hilarity of Celebrity Apprentice, I am merely going to pay tribute to the magic that is Trump hair. Enjoy.

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Praise be to those who create giffs

I really wish I knew how to create these magical moving pictures with hilarious captions…but I do not. Luckily, there are loads of creative and time rich people out there who do know their way around such things and, therefore, help us to relive fun TV moments in snippet form over and over again.

This was easily my favourite part of this weeks ep of 30 Rock.

Jack: It’s the ultimate game…Jack Donaghy, playing with himself. It’s a Jack-off.

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Bring back the Toad!

While watching Neighbours last night something just didn’t feel right. It’s a feeling, if I’m being completely honest, that has troubled me for some time now. A void. An emptiness. “What the hell is wrong with you?” I’m sure you’re asking. “Maybe don’t watch a TV show with questionable acting and ridiculous drawn out storylines” you add. Well shut the hell up! I know what Neighbours is, and I love it despite that. The feeling I was having is that of loss…loss of Toadie’s pony tail.

When Jarrod ‘Toadfish’ Rebecchi lost his flowing perm-like mane (see video below), I think he also lost a part of his soul. He was way more fun back in the day, breaking rules and breaking hearts (ok maybe not hearts, but still). Now he’s wearing suits and doing all this serious big-time lawyering. I’m not buying it!! Plus he’s  lost all that weight now, I mean sure that’s great for his health, but that sends the big-fat-party-animal meter down to zero. The powers that be down at Camp Ramsey St need to wake up to themselves! Get Toadie in a mullet wig, fat suit (I’m sure he could borrow one from Eddie Murphy) and ridiculously loud shirt STAT! Bring back the Toad!!

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